I LOVE MALVAN!!

MY NATIVE PLACE MALVAN.....ALONG THE KONKAN COASTLINE....SINDHUDURG DISTRICT....MAHARASHTRA...

i recently visited malvan, yes after a long time..it being a 12 to 14hrs journey by road to reach there.....the last time i visited there 2yrs back with my frens was wen we all resident doctors were on a strike n i was totally taken up by the richness of the place...n i had to go again....

it is full of wealth..true valuables...the sea..the trees..the fruits...the fish...the air...the sky....n the fertile land...it makes me feel so proud wen i watch this immense beauty that i belong to this land...
there are several beaches tarkarli,chivla, where one can take a dip in clear blue waters that change colours as the sun sets...n the white sand that slips under the feet with lots of colorful shells that i kept collecting greedily like a kid...n not to forget that we had to be literally pulled out of the water as reluctant as we were to return back home..yes i was accompanied by my sibs n elders ofcourse...who had dedicated themselves on keeping a watch on us:) so my sis n me secretly went up one morning jst to realise it was not safe to go sailing to the sindhudurg fort due to the winds :(

i heard abt the recent jatra... "aangnewadi"....involving around 15 lac people in the religious procession a few kms away n we visited the temple a few days later...jst wondering how it must be to accomodate such a crowd in the temple of the goddess.......

it was not jst the tourist spots but also the small things that brought a smile to my face..... the marketplace was busy.... full of chikkis ,wadis, chivda,ladoo all homemade out of watever u can imagine...cashewnut,coconut, rice, poha,moong,syrups from avla ,kokam n more....n unfortunately there were no mangoes yet.........

i jst loved the colorful boats...the several cashew fruits hanging on the trees...the kacha kairis tempting to pull at them...the seafood...the vada pav....n everything....

it dissociated me from evrythng so unreal we crave for..n i wanted to be there for longer..even the site of my redundant house made me feel like a proud owner.....

yes m greedy for this wealth of beauty...n probably more than that....i think its this land that speaks to say .."come u belong to me"..n i will crave forever to hear that..... again i love malvan... n eternally......

fitness an obsession...

i have become a major fitness freak these days...love the intensive workouts with my personal trainer n enjoy enormously the body pain associated with the used muscles....
initially it was jst weight loss that i was concerned with but eventually its now a craze..... an obsession.....
it feels great when there are subtle changes everyday in the body ,the contour of the muscles,the toned up feel n the incredible energy ur pumped up with... n the long run results with weight loss, strength n stamina give overwhelming feeling of achievement...a feel of fruitfulness of true hard work.....
its all abt regular exercise , healthy diet n not dieting, n dedication thats needed in watever u take up....n it pays as complements for glowing skin ,lustruous hair,shiny nails apart from a healthy heart n joints.....
n how wonderful it feels to wear all that u cudn wear before...n now with more confidence n grace....
well thats abt the body but mind needs fueling as well....exercise is an amazing stress buster.... it releases hormones that make u feel euphoric ,energetic n help with a good sleep that most people lack these days....
its a wrong notion that thin people dont need to workout...all of us thin or fat need to exercise to be fit n heathy n not jst for a great body but a sharp mind....
again its not abt looking good, cos beauty truely is abt ur inner self .......n one has to feel beautiful from within to look beautiful....
so exercise for a healthy body...peaceful mind...n beauty in the true sense.....n ofcourse stay away from strict diets...or monotonous diets n drugs n steroids.....jst the right exercise n right diet will do it all...
n dont wory abt the obsession....this one will help..n all the way!

cheating....

it should never be about the person who cheats u, it should always be wat u learnt out of it......is it that u should stop trusting other people,u start cribbing about hopelessness in life,n keep brooding overwhy it was you......??
ruchi...one of my dearest frens often says...ACCHE LOGON KE SAATH HAMESHA ACCHA HOTA HAI PAR DUKH TO SABHI KO JHELNE PADTE HAI... n how suffering comes into ur life u dont know but i believe it comes only to mould u..to train u..to become a better judge n of course a better person...
coming back to the cheats n liars...n how u take this positively....
1)they give u oppurtunity to forgive them
2)they give u an assurance that u definitely have someone better in life to trust n love
3)u are saved of frequent cheating episodes
4)u know ur worth...if ur honest...u know wat u deserve
5)u have an oppurtunity to evolve...jst let go..anyway wat ur trying to hold back is fake!
so dont stop trusting n loving people...cos life is a journey...a search towards ur soulmate....n all those who walk away were never meant for u:)))n a loving heart always deserves true love never a cheat.......

jimmy n me:))

one of the best companions life offered me was my pet jimmy.... came home jst 15days old...n we loved the surprise by dad,though mom was grumbling!
he wagged his tail wen we came home from school, licked our faces, n always begged for food:)
he grew in no time...while he chewed all possible things...from shoes to furniture...n was treated like the kid of the home......
all fell in love with him....but he fell n love with mom...cos she fed him...n with me...i dont know why?i told him all my woes n he licked my tears if i cried....but if jimmy was hurt we all cried....
he was a big boy n all were scared of his jaw n teeth....but not me.........i pampered him the most...got him chewes n a new belt in his neck....wud give him a bath ,brush his hair,feed him morsels from my plate,sleep on the same pillow,dust away the tics,take him for a walk or rather he wud take me for one......n much more.......somehow he became my child, though i wud tie a rakhi on him...n he wud be delighted abt it! he was extemely intelligent n understood all that was said to him...
one day he got a bad wound..n the vet said he mite lose his leg....i cried with the rest...but dressed his wound repeatedly...he howled as it pained but only allowed me to do it...n love healed him....
yrs passed attachment increased n we dint realise that jimmy was no more a young boy....he was growing old but to me he was still my child...dint ever sleep without giving him a bed....dint ever eat without giving him a part...kissed him on his face n hugged him everyday...n if he was hurt it hurt me...
jst the manisfestation of his old age worried me...i knew time was less....n wen he walked with difficulty i helped him for slow walks...gave him medicines wen he was ill...but cried abt knowing the fact...that someday jimmy my child will be gone.......
he was ill n i knew it....got a call from mom...come home soon jimmy is very ill....i cudnt stop my tears n cried aloud on the station while i got in the train..came home jst to see dad digging a grave in the garden..i dint want to believe ,stepped home to see jimmy lying still...sleeping 4ever..cudn wake him up..i jst collapsed in grief....n only we cud know the pain.......that mischievious kid who gave me joy all life..who wiped my tears n shared my pillow was no more.......
i still sit at his grave..n look into the sky...say a hi to the lovliest star......my jimmy....

joy of giving....

....i had bought a toy bicycle one day...very cute...like to collect antique n different things...like matichi khelni n other things... i like to also give away things n even part of me n without expecting from others...it makes me feel gud....i decided to give this toy to mavia... my leukemia patient...4yr old....dint live enough though... finally i gave it 2 my exam case...rachit...aur phir mavia ki yaad aayi....

i used to sing n dance with her in the special ward n she never cried when i pricked her so many times for her medication...so brave at 4!!!
one day she wanted to have sheera... not allowed any outside food...her mother was sad...her home was in MP n she cud not cook for her....but she did not ask....one day i askd mavia wat she wants since she was not eating for many days....she said sheera...

i dint know how to get it...since outside food is not allowed n i was not allowed to go home being a resident doctor...i was restless...i knew she cud die any moment...
i called ma....she understood wat i felt...she sent my aunt with a full dabba of sheera....in those days even i never got food properly...n ghar ka to rare tha....
i gave it to mavia...n wat i felt is really close to my heart....

u know wat.. life is so unpredictable...i wish i can give more of myself to every person in my life...so when its time for me to die...i wont repent a single deed of selfishness....

soulmates....

i am a great fan of paulo coelho... when i read his work, it gives me answers.. answers to questions that trouble the soul...
but i found a new philoshophy that i can truely identify with... i may seem to have magical thinking...but i guess theres no life without magic!
this girl brida is in search of her soulmate... n the path is full of risks...failure..disappointment..n disillusion....but u have to try relentless in ur search for love..
the whole of mans life is summed up by his search for his soulmate.n watever he achieves is incomplete without his soulmate...
your soulmate cud be anywhere on earth.. n if they r in pain you too suffer however unconsciously a portion of their pain...one cud encounter his soulmate for months, days or even moments...but they bring in love so intense that it justifies the rest of our days...
one can let his soulmate go unnoticed...n he will be condemned to the worst torture....lonliness.......
how does one recognise his soulmate...n wat is a soulmate?
our soul divides into two which further divides into a male half n a female half... such that a person cud have more than one soulmates...anywhere on earth....
n then y do we feel a special connection with people we hardly know...y do we understand them...y does it pain when they r in trouble... n y even those few moments justify the rest of our lives...
u see that strange light in the eyes n feel drawn to them...as if we know them since life existed...
i have met people who make me feel m just like them...who made life meaningful even without a relation to name n who came into my life from nowhere but keep me longing to to see them, meet them n live with them ....
i wish i can live the rest of my life with one such soulmate...cos i wud recognise him n wish he too cud see that light in my eyes....

life n death........

he met me just 15 days back.... pilot rajesh nair...age 31yrs..... had one dream to complete his training hours succeessfully n graduate into a pilot from a co-pilot....he liked me n proposed a marriage....i had not seen him n neither had he, being across borders... but all that he spoke seemed honest confessions from his heart.... n he was so loving, he didnt care what he wanted in return... told me all about his life....having jst got to know him i wondered how n where this wonderful person has come into my life making all confessions of love even before seeing me.....

one day i spoke to him about my hardships n he said......." m nowhere...u have crashed my ego....i have been fed in a golden spoon n never can imagine any of wat u have gone thru.... n he said he wud toast his captain... flirt with the air hostesess.....he was jst too happeeee having met a person like me he said...he said i will jst take u out of ur home into my life....to keep u happeeee all life..." all life......n true for all that he lived he gave me all happiness he cud..... yes he met with a car accident..... n is no more.....

can anyone believe that!........the kind of sweet person he was death cud only be a remote association....he cud only fly n love n make all around him happeeee.........he spoke to me even on death bed.... n asked me y did i care for him.....as sweet as he was i cud only say...i cant bear to hear ur pain...n i pray that god shud give it to me not to u..........

he loved his parents n frend neha...n said i was the next commitment in his list........being the only son he gave all his love to them....

in jst 15days life is different....n death cud be the only answer?? why?? true ,god takes away the sweetest smelling flowers from his garden n keeps them fresh in his abode in heaven....

people come into our lives...they have some role to play... i believe there was a role for me too..... i was to keep him happeee in the last few days of his life...he died with love in his heart.... love for his parents, his frends, his profession........n me.........

rajesh is now a different name... a special one.... n all promises he made he has fulfilled them by loving all so truely n dearly.........god is cruel i said first then realised....he gave me the scent of the sweetest flower from his garden for 15days n appointed me to keep him happpeee in his last few moments.... the last conversation with rajesh will stay forever fresh in my heart n his too.......... werever he is...i know he can only be happeeee n peaceful...............

we know life ends in death but we dont know wen... rajesh has taught me to live everyday as the last...to love everyone wen u live...each day...cos life may be short but still never too short to love...........n death can beat life but not the love he left back for all......